“Killing Me Softly”

Another dead body. Another mystery solved. 

I love living vicariously through Ellison! The shopping. The creative “artsy” side. The hunky husband. MOTHER. The heat and humidity. The cool sports car. The country club.

There is a hint of something more to this series than dead bodies dropping everywhere. The nuance of change for women in the 1970s. Women’s rights. Independence. Being seen. Ellison seems to walk a fine line between her mother's world and what will be her daughter’s world. 

But as we’ve seen, Ellison’s life is always challenging her to take stock of what is happening in the world around her…one dead body at a time.

“The Chelsea Girls”

 

Another fabulous New York City building with a past…another intriguing story to tell. 

What does it take to succeed on Broadway? Hollywood? Talent?  Fierce determination? Luck? What could cause you to lose it all in the blink of an eye?

While the Chelsea becomes a safe haven for artistic types, the spider web of accusation and innuendo is everywhere. Lies. Spies. Communists. Suicide. Ruthlessness. Abuse. Friendships strained. Love lost. Resentment. Jealousy. Stereotypes. Resilience. Hope.

The Blacklist.

Stay the course. Follow your dreams. Pay the rent. Keep your sanity. Find love. And  keep moving forward.

“The Dictionary of Lost Words”

 

“Which words would define me? Which would be used to judge or contain?” (235)

“Words define us, they explain us, and, on occasion they serve to control or isolate us.” (358)

Bondmaid

What words would you use to describe yourself? What words would others use to describe you? Which of those words would be spiteful? Endearing? Supportive? Descriptive? Accurate? Are the words I use to describe myself the same when spoken by someone else? Is our understanding of those words similar? Prejudice. Decorum. Society. Love. Does the written word differ from the spoken word? How does our life experience color the words we use? Does our place in society devalue or heighten our words when navigating our world? How does one use words to bridge gaps? Find common ground? Instill understanding?

Woman. Daughter. Wife. Mother. Bitch.

Is this who I am?. Some may technically be accurate. Others feel more like a placeholder in time. I am sure there are more words that reflect who I am, and the definitions will grow and change. Which words will I continue to use? Which words will I abandon? Will there ever be a word that encompasses all that I am?

 

“The Daughter of Doctor Moreau”

Dr. Frankenstein meets Charles Darwin. Survival of the fittest…sort of. Science. Hatred. Fear. Hope. Secrets. Love. POWER. When trying to create the perfect subservient human, how far is too far? How do you justify the means? Where would you draw the line? Dark. Menacing. Unreal, yet believable. When does the scientific method trump logic and compassion? How far is too far?

“Surviving Savannah”

Fell so deeply, completely…living in two worlds at once…the pull of the story both real and imagined led to many late nights reading.

“…I believe that the past echoes into our present time if only we turn our ear toward its stories.” (403)

It’s the stories of our lives that we continually share. Old stories from our youth, new stories of children, family, conquests, and disappointments. What we share strengthens our ties to our past and enriches our future. The stories are important.

“Doesn’t writing these cards make you think of how someone might sum up your life? If two hundred years from now someone made a story card of it. What would it say?” (362)

So, how do we want to be remembered? What will my legacy be? What is the sum of my life? Who will write my story? How will it be shared? So often we look at our past through rose colored lenses…reimagining the past to fit the person we’ve become, not who we were. How does that benefit the story? Isn’t it our humanity that makes the story worth sharing again and again? “We die once when the last breath leaves our bodies. We die a second time when the last person speaks our name.” from ‘The Book of Lost Friends’ - Lisa Wingate (374).

“I looked much closer at our collective ideas that survival merits some kind of worthiness, that everything happens for a reason, and that our lives are destined to end up in certain ways. I still don’t know the solid truth to any of those ideas…” (399)

Survival. Like a wildfire that picks and chooses which house to destroy, which to save, how does destiny choose its survivors? Or does it? Are we on a fixed loop, a convoluted path, or something entirely different? If we survive, what do we make of our surviving? How do we make a life out of loss?

There is so much more I could say. I had as many questions as the characters in the novel. Yet, I think that survival isn’t always about tragedy. Survival could be finding ways to live amidst pain and heartache, misunderstandings. How will the future write those stories?

“Mistletoe at Moonglow”

Last of the Christmas novels for 2023. I was hoping that this novella would be the best of the bunch. Nope. This is part of a series, so I’m wondering if the storylines build across the novellas? At one point I was hoping someone would die so there was a mystery to solve. Lots of unanswered questions. This was beyond Hallmark “gooey” movie quality. 

So, until next year; goodbye Christmas reads!!

“Run Rose Run”

 

“Dark night, bright future

Like a phoenix from the ashes, I shall rise again”

(Lyrics by Dolly Parton)

A mystery trapped inside a country western song. I’m not sure which I enjoyed more…Patterson’s storyline or Dolly Parton’s songwriting.

Secrets. Pain. Escape. Determination. Passion. The music industry. What does it take to escape your past? How can you write your truth into a song without digging up old skeletons? How do you let others into your life thinking they may hurt you in the end? Or, that they might show pity for a past life that was out of your control?

Rushing to find the secret. Hoping for a “happily-ever-after” ending. 

“Criminals, Christmas, and Campers”

 

Last of my 2023 Christmas reads…

Once again I felt I had fallen into a Hallmark Christmas movie. A small town. Happy Trails Campground. The Laundry Club. Murder. Christmas storm. Community. Happily-ever-after. The women of the Laundry Club (book club) were tenacious, caring, and generous.

 Although this cozy mystery is part of a series of books about Normal, Kentucky - I didn’t feel I needed to have read the previous books. I suppose my only complaint (and this may be an eBook “thing”) is that the grammar and editing were both lacking. Perhaps it’s the language arts teacher in me, but at times I wanted to grab my red pen!

There were plenty of twists and turns to keep me guessing. I liked that the sleuths got their bonafides from watching crime shows (something I can relate to). Perhaps, I need to dig a little deeper into Maybelline West’s life…perhaps.

“A Wish for Winter”

“May your darkest days always be filled with light. May your home always be filled with family and love. May your holidays always be filled with memories new and old. May your coldest days be filled with warmth.” (7)

“Forgiveness. Darkness. Light. Hope.” (178)

I felt like I fell into a Hallmark Christmas movie. Single 40 year old looking for a perfect match. MUST be a “Santa” and LOVE books.  The Single Kringle. I was hooked on the pursuit of the perfect Santa match. Although the storyline dragged a little in the middle, the ending did not disappoint. Loss. Grief. Forgiveness. Love. 

“We’re only strangers to one another if we choose not to connect.” (265)

My grandmother was an expert at talking to people she didn’t know, finding those links that allowed her to relate to strangers. In the novel, Susan made connections that bridged gaps, brought communities together, and healed lives. Having a conversation, seeking ways to find friendships. I suppose that is what the Christmas season is all about…and maybe connections should be sought each and every day.

A Santa Connection!

“The Twelve Suspects of Christmas”

A romp through France. A slow romp…more of a saunter really. Solve a cold case. Solve a modern crime. Beat a villain over the head with your cane. Teach “dogma” classes. Become a licensed P.I. Drink A LOT of tea. Find a friendship you never thought could happen.

I loved these old ladies. Their spunk. Their intuitiveness. Their perseverance. Who wouldn’t want to solve a crime with them? One accepting of her “old age” limitations. The other fighting “old age” tooth and nail. Both finding something is the other that enriches their lives.

Crimes solved. Friendship solidified. It’s a happily-ever-after ending that included the mob, grandchildren, convertible sports car, an old lover, and again, A LOT of tea.

This is the second of three novels I chose to kick start my holiday season!

“The Road to Christmas”

 

“That’s the frustrating thing about kids growing up. They spend all those years driving you nuts, and just when you get them to the point where you can enjoy them, they go and get lives of their own.” (48)

Family. Family. Family. No family is perfect. When we struggle to keep up appearances…when do we decide it’s time to simply pull the plug? 

Told in three “voices,” the story took us up the story mountain, then dropped us. Of course, I was rooting for the happily-ever-after ending, but for some reason it felt rushed. One minute the family is desperately trying to get “home” to Christmas without killing each other, and the next minute everything is hunky-dory. 

A little sappy at times…the theme of growing old and fighting limitations to one's freedom and mobility hit home. (I recently spent a week with my 83 year old mother-in-law) Family. Family. Family. Yep, it’s all about family.

This was the first of three novels I chose to kick start my holiday season!

“Death of a Lesser God”

“The British in India believed themselves a race of gods - lesser gods, but gods nonetheless.” (117)

“Allow me to paraphrase the Bible. ‘What does it profit a nation if we gain our freedom but forfeit our soul?’” (117)

“He remained defiant. There was no remorse, no apology. No acknowledgment that his actions had been anything other than righteous.” (368)

Narcissism. Righteousness. Arrogance. Hate.

The color of your skin shouldn’t matter. The religion you choose to practice shouldn’t matter. Culture, race, gender…shouldn’t matter. But it did in India in 1950. And there are some strong parallels to our world today. Politics. Power. Greed. Pushing people down to claw your way up. Seeking out the truth, sometimes blindly. 

Empathy. Innocence. Camaraderie. Understanding. Love. 

I wanted a “happily-ever-after” ending…although the crime was resolved, I can’t help thinking that Persis Wadia is not done yet. There is still a better ending waiting for her…I hope.

These caught my eye and warranted sharing…

“…[the] building with a billboard above the door and another on the roof that made it look as if it had just committed a crime and was trying to hide behind a mustache and a hat.” (93)

“His eyebrows alone looked as if they’d happily mug old ladies and leave them in a dark alley.” (213)

More thoughts on books and stuff at mytossiecup.blogspot.com

“The Lost Man of Bombay”

1950 Bombay, India

A frozen corpse.  Murder.  A female inspector . A POW camp. An ancient classed society. Romance. Religion. A thief. Greed. Jealousy.

Everyone is sweating profusely. Clues dropped like candy into trick-or-treat bags. Solve the crime. Throw in some romance. Add a dash of history to keep the story interesting. 

Take advantage of a country struggling to pull itself back together…lies, deceit, faith. How does one navigate it all and keep their cool (both literally and figuratively)? India. Fighting with itself for control. Looking for solid footing on which to build its future.

“Mrs. Stein Solves a Crime”

 

A cozy mystery. Just what I needed to read. No blood. No guts. No deranged killer. Just a crime that needed to be solved. It was great to revisit the San Francisco boarding house, and its quirky inhabitants. Crime solved, perpetrator exiled. Onto the next mystery!!

“The Book Woman’s Daughter”

Monsters…”you can kill the one under the bed, but there are always a few more in the back of the closet waiting.” (286)

Miscegenation (marriage or cohabitation between two people from different racial groups).

Women’s rights.

Power.

Women working men’s jobs.

Struggle.

Abuse.

Emancipation.

HATRED.

Why do we fear what we don’t understand? Why do we perpetuate hatred, based on that fear? What is it we are really afraid of? How is one’s struggle to survive a call to react with violence? To stand in judgment? The common denominator is always that we are all human beings. To be treated with respect.

Books.

“But your mother changed all that with the books…

Books are the cornerstone to greater minds.” (307)

“The Memory Keeper of Kyiv”

“Look to the future.” (365)

Did the ends justify the means? Should we be holding a mirror to these events and our own struggle with human rights in our own backyard?

Sadness. Grief. Fortitude. Politics. Lack of empathy. Love. Commitment. Survival. Denial. Coverup. Death. Rebirth. Resilience. Perseverance. Promises. Choices.

Told in two voices, I wanted to walk away from the story, but couldn’t…I had to know if there could ever be a “happily-ever-after” ending. At times it was hard to imagine that such an ending could indeed happen.

“We Are All Welcome Here”

At 14 what do you know about intolerance? At 14 what do you know about equal rights? At 14 living in Tupelo, Mississippi what do you know about Elvis?

At 14 it’s all about you. How life treats you. How you feel about EVERYTHING! How you are trying to bridge the gap between childhood and adulthood, and failing at both. Fourteen is when you start to see your parents differently. You start to take on the qualities of their lives that you like, leaving others behind. Growing as a human being.

At 14 you start to “look out the window” - to see things with a different perspective. If you’re lucky, what you see changes how you see your parents. If you’re lucky, what you see shapes your respect for them. If you’re lucky you start to see them as people, like you. If you're lucky…

At 14 can you clearly see the community where you live? Could it be different? Should it be different? How do you see beyond your own struggles? How can you look at your community as struggling too? A community constantly finding ways to survive with what they have.

At 14 your responsibilities may overwhelm you. You may see your life as a black hole sucking you in. But, you continue to dream. BIG dreams. Slowly learning how to shape them into reality. Finding strength in those who drive you crazy.

Ahh…to be 14.

“The Magician”

I know what originally drew me to this series…baseball. I love the game of baseball. BUT, this series and especially this third installment is not all about baseball. I suppose it’s more about family, dreams, and pride.

Family dynamics are often torturous affairs. What we see from the outside, doesn’t always mirror what goes on behind closed doors. Who we choose to spend our lives with, may not always be who we thought they were…or who we knew they could become. Shielding our children, as best we can, from a parent who is detached and cold, becomes a lifelong challenge.

Dreaming of a different life to that of our parents. Seeing it so clearly. Working to achieve that dream. Decisions. Sacrifices. Not understanding that those who might stand in our way, had dreams too. Sacrifices beyond what we know of their past lives. Constantly seeking approval.

Being prideful is a human fragility that is, perhaps, almost impossible to overcome. Taking pride in one’s abilities. Taking pride in what we’ve accomplished. Taking pride in who we are. Stubbornness. Not seeing others for who they are. Failing to be proud of the accomplishments of those we love. Proud of the person they’ve worked so hard to become.

Families shape us, whether we like it or not. Our dreams grow from the foundation our parents laid for us. We can be proud of what we’ve achieved, only when we understand the sacrifices they made in creating a path for us.

“The Strongman and the Mermaid”

Book two of three

Part love story. Part his story. Part her story. Part immigration story. Part survival story. Part America’s story. 

Turn of the century Donora, Pennsylvania…so hard to imagine having to quit school to help support her growing family. What about her dreams of a lemon scented home? Even harder to imagine growing up in a town where seeing the sun is a novelty. Immigrants competing for jobs. Favors. Lies. Hidden treasure. A pecking order of society. There was no guidebook to learn how to get ahead. Struggles. Traditions. Hope. Love. 

Can one find happiness in a hard scrabble life? How will they know if they’ve achieved all they can? What will they leave for their children? Is their love enough?

“After the Fog”

I know I’ve said it before, but books seem to find me. Threads of those stories start to intertwine. I find myself caught in the 1940s. Tesla, Edison, Oppenheimer,  Einstein, and Stan Musial. Tangled. Invention. Cigarette smoke. Steel mills. Baseball.

Our past shapes us, revealing our prejudices. Things we thought we had buried, play out in ways we never thought imaginable. Uncontrolled. Our environment adding to or taking away our pain. Secrets. Lies. Confession, and perhaps, redemption. How can we control the outcome of our lives? Justify the decisions we’ve made? How will we be judged? With empathy? Spite? My thinking has tumbled past Shoop’s novel, gathering steam in looking at this time in history with a different lens. Accepting what was. The wonder of the big idea. Yet, seeing what needed to change. Invention. Cigarette smoke. Steel mills. Baseball. A tangled mess.

The Invention of Everything Else

If you’ve lived a “peculiar” life, does that give an author license to exaggerate your eccentricities? I’m not so sure. This is NOT a work of historical fiction. Although there may be bits and pieces of Nikola Tesla’s life as part of the storyline, the bulk of this novel is fantasy. I felt slighted as I read. I wanted a true representation of Tesla’s life. The first few chapters held promise. The story jumped around. I was confused, a lot. It was like reading a fusion of genres. Not what I was expecting. 

“Booth”

Cherry-pick details to fit the narrative. Isn’t that what our history books do? Give the facts that lead up to and through an event. Vilify the antagonist. BUT…weren’t we all children at some point with hopes and dreams? Didn’t we all make the best of whatever situation we found ourselves in? How did our siblings see us? Our parents? How might they have struggled with our choices? It’s easy to laser focus on a point in history. But what about the ripples created by our actions? 

John Wilkes Booth’s actions were inexcusable. How each of his siblings reacted was interesting. Ripples. Parents playing favorites. Boys over girls. Ten children, six living to adulthood. A father that was barely home. Ripples.  I related to Rosalie, Booth’s oldest sister. Adventurous. Faithful. Invisible. Which details, if they exist, will be cherry-picked to tell her story?

“The Impostor”

What happened to the lion? I got kind of a creepy vibe in the beginning. My mind continually flashed to the short story, “The Veldt” by Ray Bradbury. The setting in post apartheid South Africa came with its own challenges: deserts, jungles, a highway, a town struggling to survive. Daddy issues, an escort, a golf course, poverty, and a tie to organized crime. Power, Revenge. Friendship. Depression. I wish I could say the end justifies the means, but I’m not sure it did. Galgut left me with one burning question…in the end, what happened to the lion?

“Blackout”

What could possibly go wrong in your life if you chronically lie? Lie to your family. Lie to yourself. Alcoholism. Lies. Career track. Llies. Parenting. Llies. Partner. Lies. 

Blackouts. Brain waves. RFID chips. Cell towers. Memories. Rape culture. Monied justice. Hiding the truth about everything. Friendships developed. Trust. Support. Healing.

Some of the reviews I read on Amazon were less than flattering. I found this book intriguing. I so hoped the ending worked out the way I wanted it to. For a thriller, I’m not sure it hit all the “buttons.” However, I did stay up late to finish it!

“Thunderstruck”

Living your best life…the end justifying the means to get there. I slogged through Marconi’s turbulent life to get back to the Crippen’s storyline. A murder mystery tangled in the race to make wireless telegraphy profitable. What does it take to succeed? To be happy? How do social conventions help and hinder? A race against time and technology. And at what cost? Fortunes? Relationships? Love? To what degree would we sacrifice to find just one? In the end what would we have accomplished if we didn’t follow our passion? Our name written on history becomes our legacy. Living our best life, leaving behind the broken lives of those we once loved.

“One Toe” by Lori McMullen

It was time,

To put my toe in the water.

To watch the ripples form,

To look at a future without the routine I’d come to know.

I had become a dinosaur,

Extinction casting a long shadow on my career.

Dipping my toe,

Could leave pieces of the puzzle undone.

Leaving behind a life,

That seemed filled with urgency.

Just one toe is all it took,

To set new ripples of my life in motion.

The ripples now,

Slower, gentler, different.

Just one toe,

To find a new normal, a new fulfillment.

A new set of ripples to carry my life forward.

Retired from teaching, after 21 years: June 2019

Written: June, 16, 2023